Let Your Children Be Bored!
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Well, it's official. The deep silence of summer break has set in. The fridge has been cleaned, and even under the beds. Furniture has been moved to the horror and occasional surprise of moms everywhere, who finally can proclaim "Oh! That's where that thing got off to!" Piles of school papers and missing socks have been sorted and dealt with, and perhaps even some thrilling trips have come and gone, leaving half unpacked suitcases to decorate hallways and bedroom floors. And then, from the depths of the sweltering haze, comes the universally dreaded children's cry: "Mom, I'm boooooooooored!"
For many moms and dads, this is uncomfortable enough to hear. What to do? How to solve this intractable issue? In China, this is even more problematic. Many parents opt to overcrowd their children's daily schedules with pre-organized activities. Extra English classes, sports, musical instruments and specialty camps fill many of China's urban children's school year calendars. They often get more packed in the summer. Teachers do their best to plead with parents to give children down time, to "let them be kids". But the pressure to get to the top and distinguish one's child is daunting.
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However, there are plenty of reasons to simply let your child be bored and research is there to back up the idea. Children need time and space to find creativity – it's not something that can be imposed. A child who has access to painting tools, various papers and art supplies will eventually crack them open in the absence of scheduled activity. They will find little items and dream of inventions to create, often reflecting back on work done during the past school year. They will plan, make lists of supplies, make models, experiment, try new things, fail, and try again. This is what true creativity looks like. The creation of something new. It's the antidote to boredom.
Children must learn to take responsibility for the satisfaction of their needs. Finding solutions to boredom is a skill they will need in adult life. Turning away from screens and prescheduled activities makes room for self-discovery. Boredom can help children identify their interests and passions. When we allow boredom, we open space for this. Perhaps they have culinary aspirations, and if let loose in the kitchen, will discover a new recipe or science experiment. They can learn to care deeply for pets or dive into such joys as washing a car, a scooter or a bicycle. Yes! To many children – especially young ones – these activities are a joy.
They can explore the natural world and find not just one kind of cicada – but many – and learn to classify them. They can begin to notice patterns in wind fluttering through a willow tree. If one were to dig deeply into "ordinary" experiences, they would find a trove of science and mathematical algorithms that underlie the simplest of daily occurrences. Perhaps even poetry. But … for this truly rich complexity to take wings in the cognition of a child's developing mind, it simply takes time, space, and the emptiness that comes from the gift and magic of stillness … and of boredom.
So, this summer take heart, oh road-weary parents. Be brave and strong. And let your children be bored!
Photo: Pixabay
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